Punishing players for parent behavior.

I very recently was exposed to an anomaly.  A coach punishing a player because he was upset with the player's parent?

Now let me pause to explain that parents should let the the coaches coach (or teach...you know how I feel).  As long as the rules are clear and the opportunity is equal, the parent should be there to support their child only.  I know however there are exceptions to this and so many scenarios I could publish a chapter book.  However, let's focus.  As a coach, do you take that parent frustration out on the player?

My philosophy dictates Never..No..absolutely not for any reason. 

The only amendment to this is when selecting a team.  If you know up front that a parent will be disruptive, do not select the player.  I even say during tryouts that parent behavior during tryouts will affect player selection.  For this topic, let's stick to player/parents you have selected and made a commitment to coach/teach.

Let's face it, "Daddy Ball" as we call it in Georgia is real.  Nothing wrong with a parent who coaches their own child but the team can't revolve around them.  On the flip side, if you let all the players play through mistakes you should let the coach's child be afforded the same luxury.  I mention Daddy Ball as it is usually the primary instigator for Coach vs. Parent discussion in youth sports.

Nonetheless, keep those emotions in focus.  Personally, I allow parents to ask me anything at any time.  No 24 hour rules etc.  If you have any issue let's discuss as adults.  I have no motives or nothing to hide.  No matter the lack of respect shown or situation, I do not take my emotions out on their child.  That player is there to learn, not to be punished with less playing time, rudeness, disrespect or anything that would constitute a different set of rules.

As coaches, we should make it very clear what the rules are for playing time or anything for that fact.  Everyone is equal. If a kid isn't getting the position or playing time, they should know why.  I've never understood why coaches are hesitant in this area.  Maybe because the rules vary by player?  Not sure, but it is a horrible example to set.

Be open, be transparent.  Have one set of rules for everyone and you will have quick and easy answers for players and parents with complaints.   Keep parents separate from players.  It's that simple.